Sanja Delić

Columns

Prayers, Plots, and Prepaid Sins II

By Sanja Delić3 min read

Sunday.

Not a day for God.
A day for balancing your reputation.

The smell of incense clings to clothes like an alibi.
Expensive suits, carefully chosen dresses, glances that know where to land - and how long to stay.
Church is supposed to be the place where you leave your sin behind.
But here, sin isn't left behind.
Here, sin is parked - temporarily.
Outside, a row of luxury.
Inside, a row of hypocrisy.
The men stand still.
Too still.
As if the body knows it has to play its part while the head is already negotiating the next rendezvous.

Eyes lowered.
But not out of modesty.
As a tactic.

Because real players don't look openly.
They scan.
On the left, the women.
Some with husbands.
Some without.
And some - with the clear intention of belonging to no one, yet always to someone.
Glances collide more quietly than prayer.
Deals are made without words.
Nod - discreetly, enough to be understood, not enough to be seen.

The phone in the pocket isn't there for silence.
It's a map.
A list.
An archive of sins not yet committed, but already scheduled.

And this brings us to the most dangerous layer.

The women who know.
Not the ones who believe - the ones who know.
They know who's taken.
They know who's lying.
They know who shows up every Sunday with the same pattern.
And they still choose to be part of it.

Not out of weakness.
Out of self-interest.

A parallel life is comfortable.
No responsibility, no consequences - but all the privileges.
Status without the struggle.
Closeness without the truth.

And all of it happening under the dome.
Under the icons.
Under the gaze of saints who renounced everything - while here, nothing is renounced.
Because people don't come here for forgiveness.
They come for the feeling that they've already been forgiven.

One candle.
One donation.
One hour of silence.

And the conscience behaves as if it's been handed a proof of payment.

As if sin came with a rate card.
As if God kept the books like an accountant.
But He doesn't.
And maybe that's the only thing that's truly frightening.

That there's no reset.
No button.
No balance.

Only choices.

And the truth nobody says out loud:
Not even holy places stop fornication.
They just make it more elegant.

More discreet.
Better packaged.
And much more dangerous.
Because when sin no longer hides from God, but is committed right in front of Him -
it's no longer weakness.
It's strategy.

Sunday is a networking event.
A VIP zone for those who know how to combine prayer, luxury and planning next Sunday's fornication.
Where the sacred serves as a backdrop, and conscience as a prop.

And the most ironic part of all?
They genuinely believe they're good people.
Because they made a donation.
Because they stood still.
Because they crossed themselves.

But the plan for next Sunday is already waiting - in the phone, in the head, among the pews.
And the sanctuary whispers: "I hear you, but I'm staying out of it."

Subscribe to the newsletter

Stay up to date with my latest posts, workshops and seminars...